tell your sister to shave her snatch
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Randomize