Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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