wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
