you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
