When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
