brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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