So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize