I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
