She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Just pee around me
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
