btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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