I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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