Sponge bath it is.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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