i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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