You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize