her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
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