I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
