There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
