I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize