You're completely useless in the revolution.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
