You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
