first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Randomize