I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
She even gives head with a lisp.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
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