ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Randomize
