They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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