I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
