Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
