We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
