Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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