Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
3pm strippers are depressing
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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