His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
PANTIES FOUND
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