What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize