I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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