on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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