Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
We smell like vodka and hangover
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