So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
