well I can't set my house on fire every night
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Swine flu is the new snow day.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
