and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
