The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize