just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
What a dumb baby whore.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
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