i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
