He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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