I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
