There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I look excited, but its just a facade.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
