After last night, I could never be a politician.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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