i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
