remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Two words: nipple clamps
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