In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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