be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
ugly people sure do ruin things
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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