Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
