I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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