I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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