I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Randomize
